Published: 29 Jul 2024

Axel is lost within the sound of the water as it found passage past the many rocks before entering into the pond at the edge of the clearing. The rocks are worn smooth from countless generations of washing, even back to the native’s dreamtime, possibly part of the dreaming. Minnows dart about the current chasing water boatman bugs. A platypus surfaces, it appears to be watching Axel, he smiles and releases a happy sound, sending the platypus into deeper water.

‘The letter,’ Axel thinks.

He removes the now crumpled correspondence from his pocket.

‘It is now or never regardless of its news.’

Axel retrieves the letter and breaks the wax fastener.

‘That is a first,’ he smiles

‘That is the first time I’ve seen envelope wax.’

The envelope is open although he remains slow unfolding the single page.

At last the letter is unfolded and he reads.

As Axel reads, his face prickles with joy. He again reads from the start and at end he reads it once more. He carefully folds the letter into the safety of his pocket and leans back upon the coolness of the grass. His heart is light and appears to be in tune with the babbling water. He remains prostrate for some time, eyes closed to the light with the warm sun on his face.

Eventually Daniel quietly approaches.

“Is everything alright?” Daniel’s voice comes soft and concerning.

Axel rises to seated, “couldn’t be better,” he smiles broadly.

“Then you have read your letter?”

“I have.”

“And by your expression it must be good news.”

“The best.”

The arrival of Joshua’s letter may have given Axel buoyancy but it did little for Daniel’s wellbeing. Outwardly he displayed joy but inside he became troubled towards his future. He may have announced the wish to take up a selection of land and become his own man but words and action often refuse to coincide, therefore a measure of despair is developing.

During the following day’s hunting Daniel’s aim is off, then after wasting three shots and powder, Axel is ready to comment.

“What is wrong with your aim today?”

Daniel sighs loudly, “I don’t know.”

“It better improve or there will nothing on the table tonight.”

“You take the gun.”

Axel accepts the offer but hesitates, “There appears to be something worrying you Daniel?”

“No – nothing.”

“Is it the thought of Joshua returning?”

Daniel doesn’t answer.

“Is it?” Axel repeats.

“In a way, yes.”

“Do you think I would abandon you?”

Daniel simply shrugs.

“Daniel I would never abandon you and if Joshua cannot accept you then I can’t accept Joshua.”

“But what of my wish to explore,” he pauses, “well that other side of me I have spoken of, besides in any relationship a third cannot be.”

“As I have said many times, no matter what you decide I will support you. If Joshua and I couple then you would become a partner in any business that develops,” Axel laughs, “the bed doesn’t have to be a divide between friends, beside you may bring a bride into the friendship.”

“Could you accept me with a woman?”

“Yes Daniel, even now without Joshua being here, although there is another more pressing consideration.”

“What would that be?”

“Would a woman accept me?”

Daniel laughs; “she would have to and that is the truth of it.”

“Come on let us do some hunting and forget what may, or may not occur, as Jock would say, tomorrow will look after itself no matter how you plan it.”

Continuing with their hunting the quiet remained. For Axel it was because he felt as if he was standing at the edge of a precipice and too frightened to turn away unless he slip and fall. As for Daniel, he believed he had reached a question he did not wish to face, now what were once dreams were becoming words and from the words action usually eventuated. Daniel heard Axel’s promises but he knew only too well promises often fell short when they were most needed.

During the evening meal their usual banter is missing. It wasn’t until the sound of Ding scratching at the door to be let in for his dinner, did the conversation normalised but again lowered once Ding had his meal and wanted out.

While allowing Ding’s departure Axel speaks, “what we need is a distraction.”

“In what way?”

“I don’t know I have a little money, possibly we could spend a couple of days in Sydney and take a hotel room.”

“I thought you had an aversion towards civilization?”

Axel releases a throaty laugh, “I’m improving.”

“Possibly – but.”

“What would like?”

“What I would like is to witness a native cooroboree,” Daniel suggests.

“Ha!”

“Why do you laugh?”

“You said the blacks frighten you,” Axel recollects.

“True and they did, that is until Warrin surely saved us from the escapee Matthew Cole.”

“Yes it was most fortunate he passed by when he did. What has changed your opinion of the blacks?”

“The women mostly, with a child at their hip as they work while showing, if I may say, as much or more care than any white mother.”

“Don’t let the folk along the Hawkesbury hear your say that, in their opinion of the blacks is man, woman or child are all savages, nothing better than vermin to be eradicated.”

“I wouldn’t; yet at the same time it isn’t our fault we are here.”

“Nor the like of me, almost borne here, at least suckled and raised in this country, with nowhere else to go.”

“Would you wish to?”

“No.”

“Then I would say we are both stuck here, you having no wish to leave and me given the term of my natural life not permitted to do so.”

“I do hold one concern,” Axel says.

“What would it be?”

“I was born to a convict mother between two lands; therefore I am not sure what law covers my existence.”

“I would suggest by your own words you are Currency. I was once Stirling although I would now prefer to be labelled currency.”

And I would be proud to be so called; about your wish to see a native cooroboree.”

“It is only a thought and can wait.”

“We’ll talk about it tomorrow – bed time.”

“Bed,” Daniel says.

“Do you wish to sleep alone?”

“No I would miss the feeling of having someone close, although sooner or later I’ll need to accustom to sleeping alone.”

“That may never happen, so let’s take it a day at a time. Also when Warrin next chances by, I’ll ask if I can arrange something for you.”

“Couldn’t we simply turn up?”

“I tried that once and walked in on secret women’s business. I was almost done in.”

“Maybe I don’t want see a cooroboree.” Daniel diminishes.

Early morning and already Parramatta is busy. The boys had visited Cradock’s store for shot and powder during the previous day but she had run out, so it was on to Parramatta, where they bedded down on the wharf for the night. As soon as Samuel Glass opened his door the boys quickly resupplied and where heading for the docks to take the early morning ferry back to Rose Hill and Cradock’s for lunch, when the usual tranquil street erupted into excited conversation with the latest issue of the Sydney Gazette being passed about.

“What’s the go?” Axel asks a man in the milling crowd.

“Earthquake lad,” the man expresses.

“Where?”

“New Zealand, some place called New Plymouth.”

To Axel the terminology earthquake hardly registered and New Plymouth was simply a place name but quickly to mind was Joshua. Besides New Zealand was not yet under full European colonization, although many English settlers had tried their chance on the north island, as had Joshua’s brother.

“What is an earthquake?” Axel asks of a passing stranger believing by the significance given to the conversation it was something not to be experienced.

“It’s to do with the ground shaking and holes opening, swallowing whole towns,” the stranger is enjoying his frightening of the lads.

Axel gives a noticeable shudder.

“Don’t worry lad, news travels slowly and it was some time back and so far away that no one in Sydney felt it.”

“Can it happen here?” curiously Axel asks.

“I suppose one lump of land is like another, besides Sydney shook when we first arrived and I came from the Lady Penrhyn.”

“Are you an emancipist?” Daniel asks.

“No, I am a free settler, possibly you have heard of me, I’m James Smith and I stowed away on the Lady Penrhyn which was one of the first eleven ships that arrived back in Eighty-eight.”

“Why would you do a damn silly thing?”

“I thought we were heading for America. After arriving here the Gov’ allowed me to stay, even promoted me to Superintendent of Convicts for a time.”

Daniel’s curiosity is rising, “you say Sydney shook?”

“It did, we all stood about while hoisting the Union Flag and as Captain Phillip issued his orders the ground commenced to move. Mind you it only lasted a short while and there has been nothing since.”

“I am still confused why would you want to stowaway with a mob of convicts?” Axel curiously asks.

“I was a shopkeeper of sorts back in Portsmouth and thought America could do with more cobblers. Once there I’d make my fortune.”

“So you stowed away on a ship going to nowhere.”

“That’s about the most of it lad.” As the stranger spoke he points towards the river, “looks like something going on.”

Cats are not the only curious animal and Axel, with Daniel close behind, was soon on the Parramatta wharf. Mid river is a sight to bring wonder, being a cargo barge that came up river powered by two horses on treadmills, one on either side of the craft.

The experimental two-horse powered craft had managed to power its way against the current right into the heart of Parramatta but horses often have minds of their own, especially when forced to do chores they are not accustomed in doing. One of the horses, a big gelding with hairy fetlocks remained willing to continue but the second, a slight mare with obvious attitude refused to further power its tread. With only one horse powering the craft, it began to turn in circles, as the boat’s master took to the mare with a large stick. On hearing the mare’s plight, the gelding also stopped working and the boat commenced drifting back down river towards Sydney.

Now the master is cursing and the crowd laughing when one concerned gentleman in a top hat and overcoat on such a warm day, shouted at the master to stop his cruelty. The master stops long enough to return abuse to his provoker. As the two exchanged heated suggestions a young man comes from the crowd and takes the initiative. Finding a long rope on the wharf the young man quickly ties the rope about his waist and dives into the river. In no time at all he is at the boat and after untying the rope from his person, he and the master manage to secure the boat, then as one those on the wharf pulled the stricken craft to port.

With the boat unloaded there remained a further problem, being the recalcitrant horse could not be replaced without a derrick or could the horses be encouraged to work further, therefore the master would need to float with the tide back to the Sydney docks, or admit failure of his experiment and accept a tow.

“What do you think of that?” Daniel asks as they come away from the wharf.

“I would say nice idea but wrong approach.”

“That’s our entertainment for the day we should make tracks.”

“Yes we will have lunch at Rosie Craddock’s.”

“More wood chopping,” Daniel suggests.

“Good exercise.”

“With all our walking, I think we get enough.”

Axel appears distant.

“You are conjuring up something Axel South.”

“I was thinking it is about time we got ourselves a horse and cart.”

“How can we afford such luxuries,” Daniel doubts.

“What did you think of the mare on the boat?”

“Definitely not designed for what she was asked to do.”

“She appeared quite pacey.”

“What are you thinking?”

Axel gives a happy smile, “I know where we can get an old cart and I reckon if we approached the bloke with the boat, he would be only too happy to sell her on.”

“There is something else you hadn’t thought of.”

“Go on,”

“The Stringers Creek track isn’t wide enough for a cart, even a small cart.” Daniel reputes.

Axel is again grinning; “you like chopping wood,” he declares.

Gary’s stories are about life for gay men in Australia’s past and present. Your emails to him are the only payment he receives. Email Gary to let him know you are reading: Conder 333 at Hotmail dot Com

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