Published: 4 Feb 2021

Nomos (Captain Marlberg)

Eddie had agreed to live with Lucas and Mark, but only after Mark had stipulated that next time, he got to be in the middle. Mark had blushed cutely when he realized what he’d said, and looked at me as if I were going to judge him – maybe even arrest him – for suggesting to me he and Lucas, and now Eddie, were sleeping together. I think I managed to hide my amusement, and hoped Mark hadn’t caught that. I could have said something, but suspected it would be better to ignore it; at least, to appear to ignore it. I quickly changed the subject.

“Lucas, please forgive me for asking, but do you need financial assistance? I mean, your apartment … it’s going to require—”

Lucas’s chuckle caught me off guard.

“I understand your question,” he said. “An apartment in an old building above a deli, served only by a freight elevator? I lived in that building when I was a child, before I was blinded. In fact, I lived in the apartment Mark and his mother now live in. I lived there long enough to know by sound and sense every route to every place in the neighborhood I need to go. And, now, I live there – and will stay there – because that’s where Mark lives.” He looked at Mark when he said that, and the boy’s eyes shone for a moment. I felt their connection, and saw it was good.

“Money will not be a problem,” Lucas added. “My blog and other writing bring in an adequate income. Neither Mark nor Eddie will want for anything. Thank you, however, for thinking of that, and for asking.”

Mark

Captain Marlberg tried to cover it up, but I knew he figured out what I meant about being in the middle. He was a good sport, so I wasn’t worried. Then Lucas said he lived where he did – even though he wasn’t blind anymore – because it’s where I was, and I knew it was okay with Lucas. That is, it was okay what I had said to Captain Marlberg. But I had to talk to Lucas – I just had to. And I had to say things that Eddie couldn’t hear. I had to tell Lucas that I had heard Eddie – when he was on the roof of the coffee shop. I had to talk to Lucas about wishing I could help Eddie and then being on the roof with him. I had to tell Lucas that even though I’d just known Eddie for only a day, I felt something for him like I’d never felt before, except for Lucas. And I had to tell Lucas that I was afraid, ’cause when I’d wished myself onto the roof with Eddie, I’d seen some scary things.

After Captain Marlberg left and we finished breakfast, Lucas made us wash the syrup off our hands and then herded us out of the Waffle Place. I thought we’d have time to talk when we got home but as soon as Lucas closed the door, the doorbell rang. Whoever it was must have come up the stairs, ’cause there wasn’t anybody on the elevator with us.

Lucas

I was getting accustomed to the doorbell signaling the arrival of a god. I was not, however prepared for what I saw when I opened the door this time. A boy stood in the hall. He was about Mark’s age, and he was naked except for sandals and what looked a bit like a World War I doughboy’s helmet. Twenty degrees and a wind chill of near zero and there’s a naked kid at my door? I wasn’t thinking clearly, I guess, and it took a second for me to realize that both the sandals and the helmet had tiny wings attached to them. It took another moment to realize that this wasn’t a florist delivery boy.

“Um, Mercury?” I said.

“No, sir. But I work for him. He goes by Hermes, now. I’m a messenger. Dike asked me to give you these.”

He handed me a long manila envelope. “Will there be anything else, sir?”

“No thank you. Would you like hot chocolate or something? You must be freezing!” Do you want a coat, maybe? And some pants? I thought that, but didn’t say it.

He said no thanks to the chocolate because he had other messages to deliver. Then, he vanished. I was getting accustomed to the disappearing, too.

I turned to see Mark and Eddie staring at me. They’d obviously seen the boy: their eyes were wide, their faces were flushed, and – unless I was badly mistaken – they both had erections.

“Who was that?” Mark whispered.

“Messenger,” I said. I knew I wasn’t going to get away with that answer, but I managed not to laugh.

“No duh!” Mark said. “Who was he, really?”

“Maybe this would be a good time to talk about that,” I said. “Would you two get something to drink from the fridge, and bring me a bottle of water? I promise, unless we’re interrupted again, I’ll explain.”

I opened the envelope to find a handful of papers signed by Dike – Judge Everhart, that is. Mark and Eddie were in the kitchen, whispering. The acuteness of hearing I’d developed while blind hadn’t gone away.

“You got a stiffie when you looked at him!” Eddie said.

“Yeah,” Mark said. There was a pause. “It’s ’cause I’m gay, and he was cute – and naked. And you got a stiffie, too!”

“You looked at me?”

“Well, yeah. Didn’t you? Look at me, I mean?”

“Yeah,” Eddie said. “And what did Lucas mean at breakfast about being blinded?”

“Boys?” I called before Mark could answer. They trooped into the room.

It had been less than a day since Eddie had learned that he was alone, and then had agreed to live with Mark and me. The papers the messenger delivered reflected something entirely different. When the boys were settled on the couch beside me, I explained that Eddie had been declared a ward of the state, and the judge had assigned him to me – with an assignment which constituted adoption.

“Eddie, these papers make me your legal father. Captain Marlberg asked you if you wanted to live with us, and you agreed. But he didn’t say adopt. Apparently, D—” I almost said Dike, but remembered that I wanted to leave that part for later.

“Apparently a judge,” I continued, “decided I should adopt you. Probably she did it to protect you. Someday, you may want something different, and I promise to help you find that, if you do. For now, will you not just live here but also become part of our family?”

I looked at Mark when I said this. I dared not say that a god had foretold disaster if Mark and Eddie were separated. I had to keep them together at least long enough to find out the who, what, where, when, and why of that, and the how to forestall or stop the disaster.

Eddie seemed to think about the question. At least, he didn’t answer immediately. Before he answered me, he asked Mark, “Is it okay with you?”

Mark didn’t answer right away, either, but thought it out. When he did answer, he was enthusiastic. “Actually, Eddie, it’s better than okay. It’s going to be awesome having a brother!”

I knew that we’d have to talk more about this after Eddie had gotten past the shock of his parents’ deaths.

“Guys? There’s something else we need to talk about. The messenger. Any idea who he was?”

Both boys shook their heads.

“Mark, I know you know something about the Greek gods. Eddie? Do you know what god is usually shown as a messenger? Did you see the wings on the boy’s sandals and on his helmet, or were the two of you looking somewhere else?”

Both boys blushed brightly. Then, Eddie started shaking. He clasped his arms across his chest and seemed to draw into himself. Mark grabbed him.

“It’s okay, Eddie,” Mark said. “Daddy knows I’m gay, and he’s probably figured out that we both got a stiffie seeing a naked boy, and he’s okay with that.”

Mark looked at me. I knew what his question was. I nodded permission for him to say it.

“Daddy’s gay, too, if that helps, any.”

Eddie didn’t try to get away from Mark’s hug, which I thought was a good sign. “You’re both gay?” he asked. “And … you sleep together … and …” Eddie couldn’t complete the sentence. I’m not quite sure what he wanted to say, but guessed.

“Yes, Eddie,” I said. “Mark and I love each other, and we sleep together, but we don’t have sex. And even though I hope you and I will come to love one another, too, I will not have sex with you.” Eddie and Mark exchanged quick glances. What they both were thinking was obvious to me, but didn’t need interpretation – or comment. And we hadn’t dealt with the naked boy at the door.

“Back to the messenger. Any ideas?”

“Mercury,” Eddie said. “In the windows of the florist’s shop. He’s naked and has wings on his feet and helmet like that. But he’s a man! And you can’t see his di… I mean, penis.”

“It’s okay to say dick,” Mark said. “Isn’t it?” He looked at me for an okay.

“Yes, it’s okay to say dick, but I’d prefer when we’re talking like this that we keep the words a little more, how shall I say? A little more clinical? Let’s stick with penis for now.” The boys giggled. I was glad to see Eddie giggle, because I was about to drop the other shoe.

“The boy was not Mercury, but works for him. And, Mercury goes by his Greek name, which is Hermes.”

There was a long silence. I wondered which boy would break it. It was Eddie.

“So, some guy’s running a messenger service with naked boys? In the middle of winter? I know we’re in Boystown, but still, it doesn’t make sense!”

“Mark? Do you want to start?”

“Do I have to?” Mark asked.

“No, you don’t have to say anything, but Eddie has to know. It might be easier if he hears it from you.”

Mark took a deep breath, let it out, took a regular breath, and said, “You’re right. I’ll start.”

He put his arm over Eddie’s shoulder. “Eddie? The Greek gods … well, they’re real. One of them is my daddy.”

Eddie jerked his head toward me and stared. Mark caught that. “I don’t mean Lucas. My biological father? He was Mars. The god of War. Yeah, he’s real. And so are two gods who are kids our age – Apollo and Aiden. And older ones named Dike, and Zeus. And the policeman, Captain Marlberg? I’m pretty sure he’s one, too.”

Mark added, “And Lucas … they say he’s going to become a god, too. He used to be blind, but Apollo healed him. And Apollo healed me, too. I was born crippled and lived in a wheelchair until a few days after Christmas. I’m still not strong enough to walk without canes and braces, but at least I can walk, and I’m getting stronger all the time.”

Eddie seemed much too calm, as if he had stolen away somewhere inside himself and were becoming catatonic. I was concerned, and almost said something, but he spoke first, and he looked at Mark when he did.

“I was on the roof and you came for me. You weren’t there … and then, you were. I was looking right at you when you appeared. You were so beautiful I thought I had already frozen to death, and that you were an angel. Your shirt, I remember it was yellow, flapped in the wind, and I thought you had wings. I had decided … I was about to stand up. I was ready to jump. You grabbed me. You were crying. You said, ‘Don’t! Please don’t!’

“I didn’t know how you knew I was going to kill myself, but I knew what you meant. You didn’t want me to die. And you were crying. You were crying for me.

“We kind of fell into the corner. I didn’t know then, but I found out later it was because you couldn’t stand up. Now, I know why. I was too cold and tired, I guess, to stand up. So we fell. Then, you cuddled me and tried to make me warm.

“I don’t remember much after that until I woke up in the hospital. Then I learned that you were crippled and that there was no way you could have climbed to the roof. And I figured out there was no way you could have even known I was there, or that I was about to jump.

“I knew you were something different and something special. When Lucas brought us home from the hospital, and fed us soup, things were so normal I knew you weren’t an angel. Actually, I’m kinda glad of that.”

Mark kissed Eddie’s cheek. “I’m kinda glad, too. I don’t think angels get to have brothers,” he said.

“How did you find me on the roof?” Eddie asked.

“Since my biological father is a god, I’m getting powers. I don’t know what all they will be, but I did hear you. I heard you and I knew you were hurting inside and I saw in my head where you were and I kind of wished I was there. And I was. Dike calls it translocating.”

“Dike? You said she was one of the gods.”

“Yeah, she’s one of the gods – and a judge. I’ll bet she’s the one who signed those papers.”

Mark had said what needed to be said, and it looked like Eddie was okay with it. I guessed that we’d need to talk more after Eddie had a chance to think about it, but this was enough for the moment.

“Mark is right,” I said. “It was she. She’s a real judge and a very nice lady. Someday, you may get to meet her. Now, however, we—”

The doorbell rang. Another god, I thought. Dike? Did we just speak her into being?

It was not Dike, but another messenger – this one in the uniform of a US Marshall – who delivered a large box with some of Eddie’s clothes and schoolbooks. “The apartment is still a crime scene,” he said. His voice, although a growl, was low. I don’t think Mark and Eddie heard. “You’ll get a call when you can go in and remove other things.”

“What about his parents’ estate?” I asked.

“Judge Smith will appoint an executor, some pro bono lawyer, who will be in touch with you.” Judge Smith. That would be Aiden’s father. I was glad Mark hadn’t heard that.

Mark helped Eddie put his things in the bureau and on various shelves. The competitive bonding gave way to cooperation. They giggled when they found out they wore the same size underwear, talked about the difference between Eddie’s boxers and Mark’s briefs, and, if I interpreted the giggles correctly, stripped and changed. I listened while I checked email. There was a note from my agent: the foreign distribution rights to a movie for which I’d written the screenplay had been signed. A significant payment had been posted to my bank account. I thought about Captain Marlberg’s concerns about money. Before I could answer the email, Eddie came into the room.

“Can we play Battleship?” Eddie asked. He pointed to the game on a shelf above my computer.

“I’m sorry Eddie, but not now.” I said. “I’ve got to take Mark through his physical therapy. Sometimes it hurts him and part of the time he has to get naked. I’m not sure you should be—”

“It’s okay if Eddie watches.” I hadn’t realized that Mark had come into the room.

“Um, maybe I could help? I mean someday,” Eddie said.

I thought quickly. Physical therapy was an everyday thing and Eddie was going to be here, every day. Might as well get off on the right foot. “You could help today, if you want,” I said.

Mark showed Eddie where the towels were and then went into the bedroom to change. Eddie spread out the exercise mat while I gathered the balls and elastic therabands. Then, I carried Mark from the bedroom and laid him onto the mat. I heard a short gasp from Eddie. I did my best to ignore that and the erection that poked out Mark’s nylon shorts. I knew it wouldn’t last very long.

The first part was easiest: I manipulated Mark’s legs, bending them at knee and hip, rotating the ankle, gently stretching tendons and ligaments that had not been used, before. I knelt at one side of the mat while I did this. Eddie knelt on the other side and watched.

“May I try?” He spoke to me, but looked at Mark.

“Sure,” we both said. Mark giggled.

Eddie put his hands on mine and followed the motions. Then, he did it on his own. Mark’s erection, which had subsided, popped up, again. I ignored it; Eddie didn’t. He blushed.

“The next step is to attach the elastic bands to Mark’s legs, like this,” I said, and made sure Eddie saw what I was doing. “He’ll exercise against the bands. Then we’ll move them to another position.”

Mark moved his legs. At first, he smiled because he was doing something he’d never been able to do. Then, as the count increased, he began to perspire. Then he grimaced and gritted his teeth. He did not complain, however. When he completed the first set, I rubbed his tummy, which quivered and tightened. Tummy rubs had been his reward since this began. Mark grinned.

“That was good,” I said. “Eddie? Watch how I hook the band to the right leg; and you do the same with the left, okay?”

This time, after Mark had done six sets of ten reps and dropped his legs to the mat, it was Eddie who rubbed Mark’s tummy. “He did good, didn’t he, Lucas?” Eddie asked.

“Yes, it was,” I said. “How about the first ball?”

Mark nodded and tried to pull his feet toward his buttocks to bend his knees up. He managed the right leg and was working on the left when Eddie realized what was happening and reached for Mark’s left ankle.

“Not yet, Eddie,” I said, perhaps a little too sharply. Eddie jerked back his hand.

“I’m sorry,” I said. “I spoke too quickly. Mark?”

“Um, it’s not working. Please move it, now, okay?”

Eddie bent Mark’s left leg and at my gesture, put the soft, twelve-inch diameter ball between Mark’s knees. “You may have to hold the ball to keep it from slipping out,” I told Eddie, and then began counting.

Mark squeezed the ball with his knees, and then relaxed. Ten reps of 10 seconds each; then a break; then twice more. About halfway into the third set, one of Mark’s adductors cramped. He’d learned not to scream, but his whimper was loud. The ball dropped into Eddie’s hands as Mark grabbed his left leg.

I leaned over, brushed away his hands, and massaged the knot.

“What happened?” Eddie asked. “Muscle cramp?”

“Yeah,” Mark gasped. “Happens.”

“Show me what you did?” Eddie asked me.

I explained what the adductors were and what they did. “Mark’s are slowly developing. So are the blood vessels that serve the muscles of his legs. Sometimes, fatigue poisons build up in the muscles faster than they can be removed. Mark isn’t exercising hard enough to cut in the lactose cycle, so the muscle reacts by cramping.

“Put your hands, here. You can’t feel the knot now, but you would have a few minutes ago. The trick is to rub the knot. The motion helps blood circulation, which helps remove the poison, and relaxes the muscle.”

The workout continued for another half-hour.

“Okay,” I said. “That’s it for today. Mark gets a deep-tissue massage as a reward – and to help his circulation. Um, this is where he has to be naked.”

“I said it was okay, Daddy,” Mark said. And giggled. And reached out and pushed down the shorts as far as he could. They snagged for a moment on his erection. I shrugged, and finished pulling them off.

Despite his seeming confidence, Mark blushed considerably. So did Eddie. I debated asking Eddie to help, and decided there’d been enough physical contact for one day. I hadn’t counted on the boys’ decision to bathe together.

Eddie did throw a kink into my sleep cycle. I was accustomed to going to bed at 8:00 PM and getting up at 3:00 AM. Mark had adjusted to that although some nights we’d stay up later, and I’d come back to bed when I finished my blog, and we’d sleep until late morning. I hoped that Eddie would do that, as well, but figured in the short term I’d try to get the boys (and myself) to bed by 10:00 PM, and take a nap in the afternoon. That would give the boys some time to themselves. I decided to home-school Eddie, and they’d need some time to study. I trusted Mark to do that and to keep Eddie on track, as well.

The next morning, I got up at three, listened to the news feed while coffee brewed, and thought about what I’d write in my blog. A story caught my attention. It was another lawsuit by a couple of parents who were convinced a vaccine had caused their child’s autism. The administration had reacted in less than twelve hours with a series of Executive Orders prohibiting the use of thimerosal in vaccines and allowing parents to exempt children from any vaccine ordinarily required for admission to public or private schools. The speed with which the orders were released made me wonder if they’d not had the orders written and ready to go—just like the ones on guns they’d issued in mid-January.

What idiots! I thought. No link had ever been found between thimerosal and autism; in fact, vaccines no longer contained this particular preservative – and hadn’t for something like ten or twelve years. There were strong data that showed childhood vaccines eliminated hundreds of deaths and even more cases of mental retardation from disease. And, there were data that showed that without thimerosal as a preservative, the cost of vaccines had more than doubled. This was another case in a long history of politicians using anecdotal data that happened to support a pet position. At least, that was the kindest spin I could put on it. I figured that this was just another attack on American businesses. Even I didn’t think the administration hated children and wanted to see unnecessary deaths. Did they? Would they go that far to destroy the country?

My blog was as vitriolic as I could make it. For a while, I was afraid it wouldn’t pass the censors but after nearly an hour, it appeared without changes. I shut down the computer and went to wake the boys. We had a full day ahead of us.

Mark

Lucas went down to the deli to pick up some bagels. Eddie and I got out orange juice and milk, and set the table. Eddie surprised me with a hug – and then a kiss. What he said surprised me even more.

“I’ve always wanted somebody I could talk to. I couldn’t really talk to my parents about important things. You said you wanted a brother. So did I. Now, I have one. I think I kind of love you, and Lucas, too. I know he’s really your daddy, and not mine, but that’s okay.”

“But he is your daddy!” Mark said. “More, even, than mine. Legally, that is. You’re really his adopted son. I’m just in loco creatum or something.”

“Huh? That’s not real Latin! And what does it mean, anyway?”

“Yes, it is! Real Latin, I mean. It means in place of child. Lucas is in loco parentis when Mother isn’t around, but the only legal thing he can do is order medical treatment if my mother can’t be found.” I didn’t dare say that Mars had given me to Lucas. Eddie had enough to deal with.

“But you love him so much! And he loves you! I can tell the way you look at each other, and the way he hugs you. He must be your daddy!”

“Yeah, that’s what’s really important. But if he had to move, or my mother had to move, we might never see each other again.”

It hit me, what I’d just said. Mother had threatened to move, and we’d talked her out of it, but she kept saying stuff about moving. I might lose Lucas! and Aiden! and now Eddie! I started crying. I was crying so hard, I didn’t hear the knock at the door, or Eddie opening it.

“Mark? What’s wrong, honey? And who is your friend?”

Mother. It had been she at the door. I stopped crying, mostly. “He’s Eddie. Lucas rescued him, and now he’s adopted him. And I’m going to lose Lucas ’cause he has a real little boy and I’m …” I had the sense not to say demi-god in front of Mother – I knew she would use it as an excuse to move.

“Oh. I see.” That’s all Mother said, but the way she said it frightened me more than just about anything she could have said.

Lucas came in just then. Mama told him that food could wait, and would he please follow her. I didn’t have a chance to tell Daddy what was wrong.

Lucas

Alice gestured me to a seat at her kitchen table.

“Mark told me you’d adopted that redheaded boy?”

“Yes. His name is Eddie. I know it’s rather sudden, but he and Mark seem to get along—”

“That’s not the point,” she interrupted. “Mark was crying just now because, as he put it, you had a real little boy. He didn’t say it, but I’m sure he thinks you don’t need him anymore.

“Furthermore, and we did not talk about this, but we must: Mark said you’d refused to have sex with him, even though he’d asked. And that you wouldn’t tongue kiss. That means … it means you’ve kissed him on the lips.

“I know that Mark might be homosexual, although most of what I have learned suggests that twelve is too young to be sure. I’m willing for him to experiment – but not with you!

“I’ve never said anything about Mark sleeping in the same bed with you. But with three? There’s bound to be physical contact, and that can’t be healthy. Perhaps now is the time to take Mark away from here.”

“Alice? You cannot do that. In the first place, Mark is and always will be important to me. Second, we’ve never done anything inappropriate, and I will not. Ever. And before you ask, I do know what is appropriate and inappropriate.

“You know that Mark is gay. You must have known that I was, too. That is not new; and nothing that has happened – not Mars, not Apollo and what he did for us, and not adopting Eddie – changes that.

Then, I played my trump card. “Eddie and Mark are tied together, somehow. If they’re separated, something very bad will happen to Mark … and to Eddie. That’s as real as the other things you know about Mark, such as who his father is.”

Alice’s face froze. It was as if she’d gotten a huge injection of Botox to kill the muscles that created both wrinkles and laugh lines.

“Don’t threaten me,” she said.

“Alice, it’s not me, and it’s not a threat. You know who Mars is. You accept that he is a god. You know that another god, Apollo, has healed both Mark and me. There are other gods. They have powers that I cannot imagine. And they’ve said Mark and Eddie must be kept together. Must be, or something bad will happen to both boys.”

Alice put her head in her hands. I knew she was crying, but I was afraid to try to comfort her. I sat across the table from her, miserable in my helplessness. After a few minutes she looked up. “Why Mark? And why me? Is it punishment for loving Mars? Is he the one who threatens the boys?”

I felt like I was on firmer ground when I answered. “No, Alice. It’s not punishment and I don’t think it is Mars.

“Maybe Mark had to be born crippled and I had to be blinded as a child so that he and I could become friends. And I know our friendship is a good thing. Maybe the threat to Mark and Eddie is something that will help them become friends, and I already know that would be a good thing. Both boys have wanted a brother, and now, they have one.”

I took a deep breath. “Mark and Eddie and I must remain together.”

There was one more thing I had to say. “Alice, I’ve heard Mark’s screams through the wall when he sleeps at home. You know that sometimes he wakes with nightmares. He does that, too, when he sleeps with me. When he does, I cuddle him. This is normal. After all, except for the last few seconds of our million-year evolutionary history, children didn’t sleep alone: they slept with an adult. We’re more enlightened now, and stick them alone in a dark room and then wonder why they have nightmares.

“This was before Mark knew who his father is. His nightmares have gotten worse since then. They’ve been worse except the past two nights when Mark slept cuddled with Eddie. I think that Eddie can help Mark overcome some deep fears that cause these dreams. I know that two nights are just anecdotal, and even a thousand anecdotes don’t constitute data no matter how badly politicians pretend that they do. But I hope you don’t decide to try an experiment by separating them.”

There was nothing more I could say. I sat quietly while Alice thought. When she spoke, it was as if nothing had happened – no Mars, no gods, no healing.

“I’ve got to get back to the hospital,” she said. “There’s an in-service in cardiac care this afternoon. I’ve got to upgrade my professional quals or risk losing my job. Then we would have to move – to skid row. The class will last until suppertime or so, and I’d like to stay over until my shift starts.

“Lucas? After what I said, I don’t know how to ask. I don’t even know if I still have the right to ask—”

“Yes, Alice, you have the right to ask. I’ll keep Mark. And we will find a solution.”

Mark’s physio and plans for home-schooling occupied the rest of the day. I wondered how Alice thought she’d home-school Mark if it weren’t for me, and realized that she was probably so overwhelmed with the whole situation, that she wasn’t thinking rationally, and certainly not at that level of detail. I figured Mark and I needed to find ways to make it easier on her.

That evening, I announced that Mark would be staying the night, told Eddie to take his bath and change into pajamas, and said that Mark would be next.

“Can Mark bathe with me?” he asked.

“Not tonight.” They had bathed together last night. I had watched from my chair; my responsibility for Mark’s safety was something I could not abrogate, even to Eddie. Even though Mark could reach everything now, I still helped wash him as I had before. Eddie insisted I do the same for him.

“Then, will you wash me?”

“Not tonight, Eddie. Tomorrow, okay?”

He pouted a little, but in a few minutes, we heard the Popeye song coming from amid splashes. I had an image of what Eddie did at the “toot, toot” chorus, but wasn’t sure if it were real or simply my imagination. And I wasn’t really anxious to find out.

I pulled Mark onto the couch with me. “Mark? Did you tell your mother that since I had a real little boy, I didn’t need you any more?”

His eyes got big. “Uh … not exactly,” he said. “But it’s true, isn’t it? Eddie is your real son, and I’m just the kid next door that you babysit sometimes.”

“No, Mark. That is not true. You are my first love, and my first son – regardless of whatever paperwork about you and Eddie that Dike sent us. Your father gave you to me. I accepted his gift, and that is never going to change. Eddie is my second son, and we’re not yet in love. But I hope we will be.”

Now was the time to check off one of the things on the we-have-to-talk-about-this-list. “I’m talking about the pure love, the agapé love of a parent for a child, of a child for a parent, and brothers for brothers. It’s the love that makes you feel warm and snuggly, and that makes me feel complete when you are here. Do you remember that we said that?”

Mark nodded. “I love you like that.”

“And I love you like that. Agapé love is spiritual and unconditional. There is no more than or less than. There is no I love you this much with agapé love. There is no I love you, too. There is only I love you.”

“Spiritual? I didn’t think you believed in god.”

Without intending it, I had changed the subject. “Mark, you know I believe that I can be good without god – at least, the god that the Judeo-Christian sects and cults have created. But I’ve never said I don’t think we have something spiritual within us. And what I’ve seen recently has provided evidence that I’m right on both counts. Dike is thousands of years old, you know. Zeus is almost as old as she. Apollo, even though you’ve only seen him as a twelve-year-old is probably nearly that old. They have to be spiritual, they have to be non-material.”

Mark nodded, smiled, and snuggled into my side. I kissed the top of his head, and felt that maybe things were going to work out. Until Mark told me what had happened when he translocated to the roof where Eddie was.

Lucas

“Daddy?” Mark’s voice was soft, but I could hear a quiver in it – and I felt his fear. “There’s something else. It’s about when I went looking for Eddie.”

Eddie had stopped singing the Popeye song, but we could still hear his splashes. He’d stay in the tub for a while, and Mark and I would have some privacy. I realized that bath time was not going to provide sufficient opportunity for private talks – especially if the boys insisted on bathing together – and that I’d have to come up with something else, soon. And, I still had to deal with Mark’s mother’s concerns about three in a bed.

“What happened?” I asked. I tightened my hug just a little.

“You know that I heard Eddie, and felt him, and wished I was there to help him, and I was. On the roof. And I know it happened in just a second. But it also took a long time. I know that sounds stupid.”

Mark was waiting for me to say something. “Not stupid, Mark. All this is new, and even though Dike and Apollo and Captain Marlberg – Aiden, too – have done a lot to help us, they haven’t told us everything we need to know. Maybe they can’t,” I said. “Aiden told us that the words of the gods could create reality. Maybe they’re afraid to tell us too much. But you can tell me what happened.”

I remembered how upset – and perhaps nervous – Zeus had been when I summoned him by using words that might have created a reality. Why was he so concerned? I wondered. Other than sometimes feeling what Mark and Eddie are feeling, and seeing – that one time – what Eddie had seen; maybe pushing people in the hospital to do what I told them to do; and various predictions made by various gods, I wasn’t Prometheus and it didn’t look like I was getting any so-called powers.

These thoughts passed in an instant. I smiled, but Mark didn’t see it. “And if you and I create a reality, we’ll make darn sure it’s a good one, okay?” I said.

“That’s okay,” Mark said. I felt the smile in his voice. And then, I felt it go away. “It was like a dream I sometimes have.”

That surprised me. Mark often had nightmares. Sometimes, his screams from next door would wake me. When he slept with me, I’d hear him whimpering. I’d wake him – usually before he started screaming – and cuddle him until he went back to sleep. He never spoke of the dreams, and in the mornings, denied remembering them.

“I didn’t remember the dream until then. In the dream,” he said, “I’m flying through a tunnel. It’s mostly dark, but I have a light, or one that goes along with me. I can see around me. I can see the walls. They’re stone like an old castle or something. The first time I had the dream, I thought it was one of the subway tunnels, but there aren’t any tracks or stations.”

Mark’s voice, which had grown stronger, softened. The quiver was back. “And there’s always something chasing me.”

I waited, briefly, before asking, “What is chasing you?”

“I don’t know. I never see it. I always wake up before it catches me.”

Mark shuddered and then whispered. “I think if it ever catches me, I’ll die.

I didn’t want to interrupt, so I simply hugged him a little more tightly.

“When I went to Eddie,” Mark said, “the dream was different. There was something new. The tunnel opened into a huge cave. It was too big for the light, but I heard things. Bad things, like snakes hissing, dogs barking, wolves howling, other things. The sounds echoed – that’s how I knew it was a huge place. Then, there were blackbirds that flew around me and tried to bite me. I was scared. I tried to go faster. And then I was on the roof with Eddie and about to fall ’cause I didn’t have my canes or walker. You came and I knew everything was going to be okay.”

Mark had buried himself into my side. At least he was no longer crying. I remembered something I’d studied for one of my blog posts. I don’t think there would be any harm in asking and it may help.

“Mark, Jungian psychologists ask their patients to do something called dreaming the dream on. How would you like the tunnel dream to end? If you could make up an ending, what would it be?”

Mark was silent for a long time. Eddie’s splashes had stopped, and I knew Mark and I had only a few minutes before Eddie came into the room.

“Mark?”

“I think I know how it’s going to end. The thing that’s chasing me is going to catch me, but before it can hurt me, you’re going to be there. You’re wearing the tunic you had on when you came back from visiting the Moirai, but you have on armor, too. A breastplate, and things on your arms and legs. And, you’re holding a sword and you kill the thing before it can hurt me.”

“Mark-o-mine,” I whispered. “Thank you. I want always to be your hero, and I’m happy that you want it, too.” I hoped this was a phase, and knew I’d have to help him grow out of it and stand on his own, but at twelve, if he needed a Greek warrior to protect him in his dreams, I’d accept that role.

Mark kissed me on the cheek. I saw that his eyes were bright and that his smile was wide. We’d cross one hurdle. I knew, however, it was a low hurdle, and there would be others. Before I could say anything, Eddie came in, jumped onto the couch and hugged Mark, and it was time for Mark’s bath, and then supper.

I needed to know more about what powers Mark had or would have, and a whole lot more about this translocation thing. Dike frightened me, a little. She was nice enough, but I remember when I’d challenged her about the problems and danger she said Mark would face. Something had happened, and I wasn’t sure I wanted to trigger it, again. So, I sent the boys to brush their teeth, and called Ben Marlberg.

I agreed to meet Ben for coffee the next morning at six. Alice would be home by then, and the boys could sleep in. I posted my blog by 5:00 AM, and was already at the coffee shop when Ben arrived. He was dressed as I’d seen him before except he had on a leather bomber jacket. When he unzipped the jacket, his badge was not visible. I stood and shook his offered hand. He gestured to the barista, who poured a cup of coffee and brought it to the table.

“Thank you for coming, Ben,” I said.

“You said you had a problem,” he said.

I thought he was being brusque until he added, “Helping with problems are what friends are for. Perhaps we haven’t known one another long enough or well enough to become friends, but I’d like to keep that possibility open.”

Wow, I thought. He’s not brusque, but he sure is up-front.

“Ben, I’ve never before heard anyone say something like that. I have few … no, truthfully, I have no friends. I have acquaintances. I have a short list of people I communicate with on the internet. My landlord is a nice guy, but we’re not friends. Mark’s mother might have been a friend, but I’m afraid I’ve pushed her too hard, recently. So, I’d like to keep open the possibility of our becoming friends.”

“Good. Now, what’s the problem?”

I told him what Mark had said about the dream when he transported himself to the roof. “He seemed to mix up what he saw with a recurring nightmare in which he’s moving through a tunnel with something unknown, but frightening, chasing him. We did a Jungian thing. I asked Mark to complete the dream the way he would want it to end.” I described Mark’s imagining a Greek warrior protecting him, saving him.

Ben pointed to my empty cup and raised one eyebrow. I nodded, and he waved to the barista, who brought refills. I don’t get that kind of service, I thought. And I’m here nearly every day—and tip pretty generously. The barista must know who Ben is.

“Lucas? I have to tell you something. When you think hard about something, I can hear it. I’m not pulling your thoughts, you’re projecting them. The barista doesn’t know who I am. I sent him the impression that we want refills and that he would receive a generous tip – which I will leave. It’s simpler and easier—”

“You’re manipulating him?” I said. I tried to keep my voice neutral, but know that some disapproval probably came through.

“Not really, I don’t think. I offered a fair exchange of his service for my money. I just did it a little more quietly than if I had yelled across the room.”

I thought about that, and then nodded. “You’re right, of course. Your message to him contained no coercion? It’s not like what you suggested I do in the hospital, when I found out that people would do what I told them?”

Ben shook his head. “No, I didn’t coerce. Neither did you.”

“Huh?”

“At least, if you did, you didn’t use any powers. I would have known, because I was – well, keeping an eye on you isn’t quite right – but I was tuned to you and Mark and Eddie, and if any of you had used any powers, I would have known it. No, whatever you did at the hospital was done by force of personality as well as the probability that you had the moral high ground.”

Ben quizzed me about Mark’s dream and the boy’s experience when he translocated to find Eddie. I understood why Ben was a captain of police: he was good. I could only imagine how a criminal would feel under such a pointed interrogation, and was glad I didn’t have a guilty conscience. It was, however, of no avail. Ben was not able to shed any light on what Mark had seen. As far as he knew, when the gods translocated, the experience was instantaneous. I thanked him, and resolved to warn Mark not to do it again until we found out more. A lot more.

It was far easier to deal with our mundane problem – a long-term solution to our sleeping arrangements. The answer wasn’t simple, but Mr. Simmons said it would be okay. Captain Marlberg’s question about my apartment had suggested the solution. I remembered from when I was a kid that Mark’s bedroom shared a wall with my living room. A handful of cash brought in a crew of workmen who tore out a section of wall and added a door between my apartment and Mark’s room. A couple of phone calls and a credit card number ensured delivery of a second twin bed and desk, and two computers.

Alice and I had several talks while this was happening. She seemed to understand and accept that the boys would often sleep-over with me. We also talked about agapé love, and she seemed to accept, as well, how important was our physical, non-sexual bonding.

Mark

Eddie and I had pushed our beds together. Mama knew, and so did Lucas, but neither of them said anything. We whispered a lot before we went to sleep. At first, it was from the edges of our own bed. Then we started getting into one bed and cuddling while we whispered. We usually got stiffies when we cuddled, and we talked about that, too. We talked about sex, and a couple of times jacked off after these talks. I’d learned my lesson, and made sure that we had handkerchiefs that could be rinsed out in the sink the next morning.

After a few weeks of this, I dreamed that Eddie was performing fellatio on me. I knew what it was because I’d watched stuff on the internet. In my dream, I lay on my back while me took me into his mouth, and deep into his throat. It didn’t take long for him to bring me to orgasm. When he did, I woke up not to a wet dream, like I thought I might, but to find that my penis was really in Eddie’s mouth and was filling it with my cum. By this time, even my awake self had lost control. I could not stop him even if I wanted to.

Even if I wanted to. These words haunted me while I gasped with release. I felt Eddie suck out the last of my cum while I quivered with good feelings. Eddie raised his head and then lay beside me, his body pressed tightly to mine and his arm draped over my chest.

“Eddie?” I whispered. I felt him shiver, so I put my arm around him and pulled him close. “Eddie, I know what you did. I thought it was a dream, until I woke up and it was real. In my dream, I didn’t want to stop you. When it was real, I couldn’t stop you. But I should have! This isn’t right!”

“It has to be right!” Eddie said. He was crying, now. I felt his body shaking with sobs; I heard his voice become throaty as his nose filled with tears. “It has to be right because I love you!”

“Oh, Eddie, I love you, too, but I love Lucas!”

Eddie’s tears stopped and his body stiffened. “I know!” he said. “I know and that doesn’t have anything to do with it. You can love Lucas and me both. It’s different. We’re different!”

All I could do was hold him until we fell asleep. The next morning, we were both in our own beds, my pajamas weren’t down around my ankles, and Eddie said nothing. I realized that the whole thing had been a dream. I’ve got to talk to Lucas!

Lucas

That winter gave way to spring more slowly than in living memory. Some people blamed La Niña, which had begun to dominate weather patterns in the Americas the previous fall. Others blamed the scientists who had warned of global climate change, although the illogic of this escaped them. Eco-terrorists from the fringes of the environmental movement began to attack the electric grid, destroying power lines. The electric company had to institute brownouts and rolling blackouts. A UPS kept my computer and modem operating, but I missed several deadlines when my ISP’s servers went down. The Army managed to beat out the TSA for the mission of protecting the power lines. (The TSA’s arguments that the lines were “transporting” electricity and that the electricity was used in transportation terminals was laughed out of contention, frustrating those in the administration who were determined to use every crisis to increase and consolidate their power.) After several would-be saboteurs were shot “while resisting arrest,” the attacks stopped, and things went back to normal.

Well, not quite normal. Not in our household. In early April, Mark came to me with the first crisis.

“Lucas? I don’t know what to do!” We were sitting side-by-side on the couch. When he said those words, he dug himself into my side and wrapped his arms around me. I felt him shaking.

I put my arms around him.

“Mark-o-mine, what’s wrong?” I used his pet name. I used it so seldom that it got his attention. He stopped crying and squeezed me even harder.

“I love you!” He started crying again.

“I love you,” I said. “Love is a good thing, so that’s not the problem.”

“I love Eddie, too! And I promised Aiden …”

I waited for a few moments, but Mark said nothing else. So, I asked, “Why is it a problem that you love Eddie, Aiden, and me?”

“’Cause I want to do sex with Eddie, and so does he. And I think, I hope, that when we get to when Aiden is, he wants to do sex stuff, and I want to do sex stuff with you and you won’t!”

I thought I had the answer. “Mark, we talked about this. Love isn’t just about sex—”

“No, but that’s part of it! And if I do sex stuff with Eddie I can’t do it with Aiden, and if I do sex with Eddie or Aiden then I can’t do it with you when I’m eighteen.”

He hesitated. “You will do sex with me when I’m eighteen, won’t you, if I wait, I mean?”

My answer came quickly. I’d thought about it for a long time. “Yes, Mark. When you’re eighteen, if you still want, we can do sex.

“But that has nothing to do with having sex with Eddie or Aiden. Do you remember I said that you can love more than one person, and that it’s okay to do that?”

I felt Mark’s head, buried under my arm, nod.

“It’s okay to have sex with more than one person, too, as long as it’s someone I know and approve of, and that you avoid lustful acts.”

“I don’t know what that means,” Mark whispered into my chest.

“Mark, having sex just to get the good physical feelings that come with it, is lustful. Having sex that hurts someone else is lustful. If you have sex with someone you love, if you both get good feelings, if you, oh, I don’t know, if you try to make the other person happy and feel good, if you cuddle afterwards, if you cuddle first and don’t just jump in and get off, it’s not lustful. If you can do all that, you can have sex with more than one person you love.”

“Lucas, I had a dream last night,” Mark said. He told me the dream, and then pulled away enough that he could look up at me. “It’s okay for me and Eddie to have sex?”

“Eddie and me,” I corrected.

“Eddie and you! What—”

I laughed, then realized that Mark looked not just puzzled, but hurt.

“I was correcting your grammar, silly goose! I meant Eddie and you!”

I thought I had successfully solved this until Mark said. “Actually, I was hoping you would show us what to do.”

“Mark? You’ve seen stuff on the internet, haven’t you?” I’d not filtered the computers in the boys’ bedroom, and knew Mark had watched stuff on my computer.

“Yeah, but that’s all lustful acts, I think. I mean, will you show us the love part of it?”

Oh, I thought. And the safe parts of it. And the what-might-hurt-so-don’t-do-it parts. And the dangerous parts. And the wait-until-you’re-older parts. Well, Lucas, you wanted to be a daddy; it’s time you started earning your keep.

Mark

Lucas had told me never to translocate until we could learn more about it, so I wasn’t surprised when he said Ben would be visiting to work with me. We talked a lot about what he did, and how he did it. He talked about the power that the gods seemed to get, and said he saw that I had a lot of it.

“There’s a kind of glow, that only other gods and spirits can see,” he said. He showed me in my head how to look for the glow.

“I can see it!” I said, and turned to Lucas. “I can see—” I stopped talking, and stared.

“What’s up, Mark?” Lucas asked. “You can see Ben’s glow, right?”

“I can see Ben’s, and I can see yours, too. Ben’s is golden. Yours is silver, but it’s the same thing, I think.”

“Ben?” Lucas asked.

“He’s right,” Ben said. “I saw it at the coffee shop, but was afraid to say anything.”

“Why?” Lucas asked.

“Yeah, why?” I asked. “Is something wrong?”

Ben seemed embarrassed. At least, he blushed a little, and looked at his feet. “I’ve never seen a silver glow, before. All the gods and spirits are gold. But you’re supposed to be Prometheus, the Bringer of Light. Dike said she didn’t know what your powers would be, and I didn’t want to influence reality by saying something. I still don’t. Please?”

Lucas nodded. “You’re right, of course. What’s next for Mark?”

“I’m going to translocate Mark and me somewhere and, after a few minutes, back here. We’ll find out what Mark sees. If that’s okay?”

Lucas agreed, and Ben moved to the middle of the room and gestured for me. I slid my canes onto my arms and stood beside him.

Lucas

Mark and Ben disappeared and air popped in to fill the space they had occupied. Eddie giggled, but it was a nervous giggle. I heard his sigh of relief five minutes later when they reappeared. Mark handed Eddie an orange. “California,” he said. “Ben made me pay for the orange.”

“Any tunnels?” I asked.

Mark shook his head. “No tunnels, and it happened really quickly.”

“I did the translocating,” Ben said. “Now, it’s Mark’s turn.”

He turned to Mark. “Do you remember the orange grove? Show me.” He seemed to study Mark.

“Okay, you have a good picture of it. Take us there.” Again, they vanished.

Five minutes later, they reappeared. No oranges this time, but Mark’s face was white.

“Tunnels.” I said.

Mark nodded and stumbled toward the couch. I jumped up, grabbed him, and set him on the couch. Eddie had seen Mark’s face, too, and joined us. We sandwiched Mark between us.

“It was chasing us!” Mark said. “It was chasing us and I tried to go faster but I couldn’t. I tried to tell Ben, but I couldn’t. He was beside me, but he didn’t see me!”

After Mark had calmed down a bit, Ben told us what he’d seen. “It was as instantaneous as normal. Whatever is happening, is happening only to Mark. When we got to the orange grove, I saw that he was afraid, and I did the translocating back here.”

Ben shook his head. “I’m sorry Mark, Lucas, but this is beyond me. I think you need to ask someone a great deal older and smarter.”

I knew two I could ask: Dike and Zeus. I agreed. “Thank you, Ben, I’ll contact Dike or Zeus. In the meanwhile, however, these two boys haven’t eaten since lunchtime. Would you join us for pizza? It’s within walking distance.”

We had a good time at the pizza place. Mark and Eddie no longer engaged in their gross, competitive bonding behavior, but still managed to devour more pizza than I can remember having consumed at their age. Ben and I split a pitcher of beer, and I made a joke about “translocating while impaired.” I was careful that Mark didn’t hear it, and Ben thought it was funny, at first, and then started talking about the critical control necessary to translocate. I realized that the alcohol hadn’t affected him, at all.

Dike seemed pleasant when she accepted my phone call. I explained the situation, and described Ben’s work with Mark. She said she had no idea what was happening, but that she’d ask others. It was a few days later that she called to report that no one else had experienced anything like it.

“What if I were to ask Zeus?” I said.

“I’ve already done that,” she said.

“What should we do?”

“Don’t let him translocate,” she said. The phone went dead.

Part of me was a bit relieved. These gods were powerful, but they weren’t omniscient. I kind of liked that. On the other hand, I was afraid for Mark.

By late spring, Mark could walk and run a short distance without help or support. He wasn’t ready to play tag with Eddie or to join the track and field team at the gym where we all worked out, and when we went out, he usually wore braces and used canes. Still, for someone who’d never walked before, he was doing very well.

Not, apparently, well enough – at least, in his own eyes. The next crisis came in June after Eddie and I had joined a pick-up game of volleyball at the gym. Mark sat on the bleachers and watched. I had seen but hadn’t paid much attention to the boy his age who sat beside him for a while.

When we got home, and while Eddie was taking his bath, Mark pulled me to the couch and curled into my left side. “Lucas, do you like Eddie more than me ’cause he can play volleyball and stuff?”

“Mark, you were and always will be my first son. I love you. And I love Eddie. And, unless I miss my guess, so do you.”

Mark nodded, and pulled a pamphlet from his pocket. “Some kid at the gym gave me this. He said I was too young and too cute to be sitting by myself. I read it. And it scared me!”

I looked at the pamphlet – tract, rather. The front bore the logo of an infamous, self-proclaimed Christian “family” organization and the headline: “Will Sex be Your Road to Hell?”

I nearly threw it directly in the trashcan, but Mark said he had read it. So, I read it, too. It was what I expected: any form of sex outside heterosexual marriage was a mortal sin. Any sex among married couples other than normal intercourse for procreation was a mortal sin. They didn’t describe normal, but I bet it didn’t include reverse cowgirl.

Contraception, according to them, was a sin. Abortion was a sin. Premature withdrawal and the rhythm method to prevent pregnancy were sins. Pictures of people screaming amid flames as stereotypical devils leered and poked them with pitchforks adorned that page of the tract.

Sacred marriage blessed with children – along with an appropriate contribution to this particular ministry – would bring eternal reward. That page held a picture of happy couples, men and women holding hands, wearing white robes adorned with the logo of the ministry (!) approaching the gates of heaven. Didn’t this guy ever read of that part of Matthew where Jesus said that in the resurrection they neither marry, nor are given in marriage? Of course, maybe whoever wrote the Gospel of Matthew got it wrong. None of the other gospel writers seemed to think this was important enough to include.

Before I could say anything, Mark pointed to the pictures and said, “So there is a heaven and a hell, and Eddie and I are going to hell, and if you and me have sex we’re going to hell because it’s a sin?”

I was too stunned to correct his grammar – stunned at both the thought and the anger with which Mark expressed it.

“No, Mark! Please don’t think that! In the first place, if we had sex now or later it would be a sin only in the context of some limited interpretations of the Judeo-Christian religion. In fact some people who have studied the earliest versions of Matthew – let me think – Chapter 8, verse 5 and on – believe that the beloved–child-servant whom Jesus healed was the centurion’s catamite. It was very common for a soldier of his rank to have a catamite – a boy who was loved and with whom the man had sex. The words used in the earliest versions of the gospel to describe the child-servant were commonly used elsewhere to describe exactly that kind of relationship. Whoever wrote the gospel – and we know that wasn’t Matthew – would have known that. Yet he said Jesus didn’t hesitate to heal the boy and praised the centurion for his faith.

“It was Jesus, too, who instructed his followers to love one another. It’s pretty clear he meant agapé love, but agape love doesn’t include, and specifically excludes the hatred that many Christians feel and show toward homosexuals. Those who have that hatred are violating the most important commandment they were given.

“Some Christians disguise their hatred with the expression, love the sinner, hate the sin; however even there they’re being judgmental – which they were also told in no uncertain terms not to do. That’s another violation of their own rules.

“And, Christianity is only one of several major belief systems. The Buddha didn’t consider homosexuality a sin, although he warned against empty lust of the flesh. He taught that any sex, gay or straight, might slow one’s progress toward ultimate fulfillment, but not that any kind of sex is inherently sinful. Islam warns against homosexuality, but always in the context of lustful relationships, not the acts, themselves. And Hinduism does not view homosexuality as a religious sin – and actually, a religious sin is the only kind of sin that can exist.”

Mark’s eyes hadn’t quite glazed, but they were moving back and forth. I knew that meant he was thinking.

“So, it’s okay for you and me to have sex?” he said.

“No, Mark. It’s not. In the first place, even though you and Eddie are having sex, I don’t think you’re ready to make the decision to have sex with an older person, yet. There are dynamics that are different from those of people the same age.”

“What’s dynamics? And what makes them different?”

“It’s things like who is in control. It’s about an imbalance of power. It’s whether the relationship is balanced. It’s—”

“It’s a lot of bullshit,” Mark interrupted. “At least that’s what it sounds like. If you don’t know the answer, don’t make something up. You’ve never lied to me before!”

“I’m not lying,” I protested. “It’s just that there are things you don’t know about and which I’m having a hard time describing. And don’t say bullshit!”

“Bullshit! Bullshit! Bullshit! You can’t tell me what to do! You’re not my daddy! If you won’t have sex with me, I’ll find somebody who will!”

Mark disappeared. Oh, no! That was my first thought. My second was, he’s separated from Eddie.

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